Today, I Stopped Telling Myself That I'm Lost. I'm Not. I'm On The Road. I'm Not Lost. I'm On My Way.

 

For the last couple of weeks, I have been going back & forth, trying to figure out exactly what I need to do & exactly how quick I can do it.

See, what I'm going through is the "I just graduated from college a month ago...what do I do now?"

To be honest...I don't believe that I know the answer to that & that has been bothering my soul tremendously. I just did not understand why I felt so lost & confused. So meanwhile, I applied & made deposits to two schools in New York City for Graduate Programs dealing with Photography.One program starts in March & the second starts in June. 

So, I had made my mind up to start in March because I honestly hate NOT being in school. However, the signs for starting in March are NOT as clear as I thought they would be. This began to scare me about two weeks ago. 

While searching for scholarships & private loans, my process began to become more discouraging.  

But, this morning I woke up & I felt different. I had to ask myself, "Why am I so hard on myself?"

I just graduated from college a month ago, I have no kids, no legal attachments, I'm healthy, I have a warm place to sleep, & I'm only 23 years old. I am not perfect. Why am I in such a hurry to leave...again??

I realized that even if I don't make it to Grad School in New York City in March...I'll still be there in June. By the latest.

Even though it was something so small, it brought so much comfort to my soul. The fact that I'm no longer feeling lost, Because I'm still on my way...

So, today I stopped telling myself that I'm lost. 

I'm not.

I'm on a road with a destination.

I'm not lost.

I'm still on my way.